OUR HALLOWEEN MASKS

Masks. 

Halloween.

Chronic Pain.

The perfect trifecta.

It's so true that we disguise ourselves. Whether we have a chronic illness or not we usually never tell the truth when someone asks how we are. I mean, who really answers the question when someone asks how you are? It's really bad when you have chronic pain.

"How are you doing today?"

Not good.

All I want to do is sleep.

I'm in huge, big time, pain.

My hands hurt.

My head hurts.

My back hurts.

I'm not sleeping real well.

My whole body hurts.

Every bone in my body hurts.

I ache.

I'm tired.

I feel horrible.

I can't seem to get out of bed.

I can't concentrate real well today.

What did you say?

After a while no one wants to hear it anymore.

Let me clue you in on a little fact.

After a while we don't want to say it anymore either.

So we say:

I'm okay.

Or we fake a smile.

I'm just a little tired.

Or we fake a smile.

It could be worse.

Or we fake a smile.

Today's not a real good day.

Or we fake a smile.

Or we burst into tears.

And we still try to fake a smile.

Or better yet....we just don't say anything.

We mask it.

Anyway, we disguise how we feel. We disguise the pain that we feel. We disguise the guilt that we feel. We disguise the depression. We disguise the lack of sleep. We disguise the embarrassment over feeling sick yet again. We disguise the forgetfulness. We disguise everything.

It's funny how Halloween brings to mind the nature of chronic illness because we wear masks almost daily. 

We have to stop and take off the masks.

Because.

We don't want to be a mask.

A mask with a beating heart.

BOO

There is no dignity left.

None.

I usually dread Halloween because it would drive the doggies nuts. Given the prospect of doorbells ringing and dogs barking I still want them to dress up a bit. 

Mr. H loved his tux but HATED his pumpkin outfit. He looked like a big, fat tick. Buster decided to be bat-dog and protect the masses at "pawthum" city. (thanks D!)

Just a quick post to show him waiting for his share of the candy. No, he can't have chocolate but he does get his "snackers" in a cute Halloween bag!

So now we're on to November and 30% humidity. It's been a pretty rough time. Just when you think it can't get any worse.......

Bat-dog is ready to retire to the bat cave.....

It's been a very stressful night.