Friday, May 28, 2010

MORE OF THE SAME


I guess I should be thankful.
I got a couple of days where I felt almost
Sub-human.
Oh joy.

Well, lookie here. It's 4 in the morning and I've gotten maybe 2 hours of sleep. Great. Now I'm up and I hurt. I've taken melatonin and medication and zip-a-dee-doo-dah. I actually fell asleep before I could post what I'd written earlier. So I guess I'll post it now.


The old familiar ache in my hands started and I wasn't even conscious that I had started rubbing them. I finally snapped to it and wondered why it was happening. 

First of all, I checked the humidity and it had gone from about 10% to 35%. Yep, that will do it right there. Add to the humidity factor the other stresses going on right now and here we go! 

I am so sick of this pain. I think I'm going to try Corvalen-M by Bioenergy. Dr. Teitlebaum talks about it in his book and, well, it's worth a try. It's a mixture of D-ribose and magnesium. It is supposed to reduce the pain and increase the energy levels. The only thing I can say to that is that I know it will increase my energy otherwise I'd be comatose. In other words, there's nowhere to go but up.

The constant pain is getting to me.

I'm tired of getting on the roller coaster and then praying to get off. I'm tired of being tired and I'm really tired of the pain. I get tired of saying how bad I feel when someone asks "how are you?" Right now I'm in a really pissy mood because the pain is building again and I just want to curl up around my body pillow and pray for sleep and I know that it won't happen.  I think I'll take the medication and a melatonin and see what happens. 

Maybe if I catch a couple of hours of sleep I'll feel differently. I feel like a wimp. A big, fat wimp.

And really pissed off. It should be a dandy of a day.


I guess it's time to put on a movie..............(huge sigh...............)





4 comments:

  1. Oh Rose, damn it! You hardly got a break! Having our hands and necks and shoulders hurt is a really heartless part of this disease. One of the biggest things that keeps us from going right over that edge is that we can communicate with our fellow "sisters in arms" fibro fighters. But then, NO, we hurt too badly to get on the computer. Damn, damn, double damn, triple damn..,BLAST!(an oldie but goodie from my sibs and my past).

    You asked me where my husband had taken the job and hence, where we are moving.That is an answer that scares the ever lovin' $#*@ out of me!!! NEW ORLEANS! Picture humidity!...presently 49%, 90 degrees and thunder storms!!! ...Picture barometric pressure all over the place! Picture hurricanes!!! Picture me cowering in a corner clutching my Vicodin and shoebox full of additional meds. I really am scared to death. If the humidity is typically 10-12% here in the desert, except during monsoon season when I want to kill myself and just be done, can you imagine how I will manage in New Orleans??? I can't manage 10-12% humidity!

    No offense to New Orleans, folks! It is the weather we are talking about.

    So, I will pray for your relief today. Please stop the pain in Rose's hands! Please help her (and me, too please) get some much needed SLEEP today, too!

    Hang in there. Remember, this too shall pass. Actually, I really hate that phrase --it may pass, but something just as bad or worse is right around the corner!

    Trying to stay positive, but hangin' by a thread,

    me
    CJ

    ReplyDelete
  2. OH CJ......The first thought that came to my mind was OH F**K! Oh dear one....and you're worried about my hands?????? God Bless You! New Orleans??????????? You're right but my phrase is "when you can see the light at the end of the tunnel it is probably the train coming at you full speed."

    I've got a million of them!

    OH MY GOODNESS..........CJ I will be praying and praying and praying for you!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I say we all 3 just move to an island somewhere.....:) maybe we can get someone to fund us and make we can do a 6 month test study to see how we do with no humidity..:)
    I have to thank you both from the bottom of my heart, I honestly don't know how I would be getting thru all this with out your support!! When I first got this crappy fibro I wondered how my life would ever be ok??? Then I get friends like you and you help make each day a little o.k. I believe God brings people into our lives for a reason and I thank him for you both!! I am praying that your pain goes away Rose and CJ, I pray that New Orleans has a freak of nature weather change.... :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Cool! I pick somewhere in the Cayman Islands or the Hawaiian Islands. I know the weather affects us so much. I feel so bad for CJ going to New Orleans. You know what is wonderful though? You, CJ and Michelle. It is so wonderful to feel such a bond with women going through the same things and seem to be SO much alike!

    I know what you're going through with your mom. I lost my parents when I was 21 and 24 in kind of the same circumstances. It is so stressful and heartbreaking to watch your parents get ill. I just pray for a quick recovery for her!

    I just hope the stress of all this doesn't knock you out. Take care sweetie!

    ReplyDelete

Please leave a comment!