Sunday, March 2, 2014
The Fibromyalgia Series, Part I.
OK....some of my traits don't change.
Fibro or no Fibro....
I tend to be Impatient.
I - well, let's start with that lovely word impatient. There are times that I live in denial so when I decide I am not going to let my symptoms get in my way; then I am impatient. I'm impatient to get moving and to do anything I can whether I'm up for it or not. Yes, I do pay for that impatience. I didn't say I was the brightest candle in the box when I try stupid things. I was going to say very, very impatient but, then I thought, either you're impatient or you're not. So there you go.
I - absolutely has to stand for invisible Illness. We can look like we feel fine to the untrained eye. Only those people close to me can see when my mouth is smiling but my eyes aren't. We still struggle with the invisibility issue. On one hand, it doesn't give credibility to the fact that our bodies are in a great deal of pain and that we struggle with so many issues and symptoms. On the other hand, that invisibility can shield us from that very credibility issue. Unless we want to come out of the shadows, we can hide there.
I - then a lot of us deal with Insomnia. Either we cannot get to sleep or we fall asleep quickly but don't stay asleep. That's the part I deal with....the lovely alpha wave intrusion. Those pesky alpha waves that love to pop in just when I'm about to go into a refreshing deep sleep.
I - is also for the inconsistency of my symptoms. Every day can bring a different issue and when compounded by stress or even the weather...well, it's a symptom free for all.
I - is also for the inconvenience these symptoms bring to our lives and the lives of our friends and family. When we try to plan something (I know....I know) something will invariably rear its ugly little head and shred those plans into oblivion.
I - is for the struggle we face with isolation. Chronic pain tends to do that. After all, who wants to be out and about when you're tired and in pain? This is one area that we really do have to fight. It's not good to be alone. We have to reach out whether it's friends online or a support group. If friends and family don't understand this illness there is help out there.
I - is for issues. We all have them and chronic illness can compound them. None of us are alone in this fight. Some of the nicest people that I can call my friends are those that I've never met face to face but truly get this illness and would be there for me if I need someone to talk to and vent.
I - is for just feeling icky.
I - is for the imagination we use to manage our symptoms.
I - is for irritable.
Hey, being really tired and in pain tends to make one a tad snippy.
I'm real good at this one.
Especially first thing in the morning.
Especially before coffee.