I NEED TO BE IN ALASKA

I know.

I did say it was a dry heat.

Who cares?

It's still hot.

It must be summer because all the articles about heat intolerance have been popping up. I know there are both ends of the spectrum but I'd much rather have cold intolerance because you can always put on gloves, sweaters and jackets. You can only take off so much and then you're still hot. It never goes away.

I live with someone who doesn't get hot when the thermostat is at 80. It's not easy to live with. It's a never ending battle just turning it down to about 76. I know that the a/c bills in the summer are high but, on the other hand, I don't use much heat in the winter so it balances itself out.

You'd think.

I have to sleep with covers. I need the weight of them to feel comfortable enough to sleep. I also have a portable evaporative cooler that I put ice in every night so I have cold air also coming into the room and blowing on my face. If the thermostat is ONE DEGREE over 76 it's so hot that I can't sleep. I'm just one of those people that cannot take the heat.

Yeah, I live in Vegas.
Ironic, isn't it?
Go figure.

It has been a couple of months where the temperature index ranges somewhere between OMG and WTF. Yes, it has been that hot. I wanted a fountain diet coke and the thermometer in the car read 119. People with Fibromyalgia have an intolerance to either heat or cold. Mine just happens to be heat and I live in the middle of the desert.

I will NEVER understand it.

Who the hell came to the desert 100 years ago....(I'm actually glad they did)

Looked around.........

In the middle of nowhere...........

Hotter than hell............

And said............

Yessiree...................

I think we should settle here.

Thank goodness I wasn't around then.

They would have shot me.

BUT IT'S A DRY HEAT

40 feet up.

Under the eaves.

In the shade.

And it's still 114.

You would think that after 53 years I would get used to the summers in Las Vegas. Nope. Not at all. As long as I was in the pool I would be ok. Other than that? No way. Stay inside in the air conditioned house or get in the air conditioned car. 

Since the onset of my medical issues a dislike has turned into an intense hatred.

Plus, the heat makes me very irritable.

I don't know whether its the change in temperature that causes a flare or that my thyroid has caused the intolerance for heat but I feel like I'm going to pass out in this extreme heat. We've had excessive heat these last few weeks. I wasn't kidding about the 114 degrees. The official heat is measured at our airport about 40 feet up and under the eave in the shade. Really. In all actuality it will probably be 119 in the lower parts of the valley. This kind of heat is smothering. The temperature in the car can easily get to 140. You don't mess around with those kind of temperatures.

It gets dangerous.
No kidding.

If you can you have to plan any errands in the "cooler" part of the day. That means before 10 in the morning and after 7 at night. Last night at 9 pm it was 105.  Even then I take a cooler with me to the store because a trip to the store can mean frozen food can start to thaw and milk begins to warm up. Sunglasses are a must if you have light sensitivity (which I do). 

And you have to stay hydrated.
Again, no kidding.

So I'm hibernating this week and praying that the heat will break, otherwise, it's going to be a doozy of a summer. The natives of Las Vegas used to joke that the official temperature was lower so the tourists wouldn't be scared away. I know that the temperature on my car registered 120 the other day coming home from Costco. 

So here I am wishing I was in Antarctica.

There is one upside....

Hey, it's a dry heat!

Thank goodness for small miracles!!


Update: The clouds have moved in and the humidity is starting to rise. Great. Just great.

I'VE WALKED MILES IN MY SHOES

It's been awhile.

I need more shoes.

So.

More walking in my shoes.

Mornings? Coffee with a diet coke chaser.

Doctors just throw more pills at you that don't work.

I want to get moving again.

I never know from one day to the next what lovely symptom is going to pop up. 

 Of course then there are the words we all love to hear, "I get tired too."

I don't even remember what it was like to wear these all the time. 

Sometimes it just gets depressing.

It costs a lot to have Fibromyalgia.

It feels like you've been hung out to dry.

So when all those symptoms seem to never go away.

I always try to remember that tomorrow will be a better day.

or....

sometimes.....

I just can't help it......

I just have to say.........

I JUST LOVE PERSONAL GROWTH

One day it's 90.

The next night?
It's 49 degrees.

It just never stops, does it?

I shouldn't say too much about the weather change. I mean, really, I should be thankful. It isn't humid, or raining or snowing or freezing.  When it's 90 degrees I'm not a happy camper in Fort Stinking Desert or FSD as I call it. For starters, I know some people have trouble with the cold but I'm not one of them. I figure if I'm cold just pile on sweaters or comforters. If I'm too hot??? You can only peel down so far and you're still hot.

Ok, I'm rambling....
On too the next thought.......

Right now Fibromyalgia has been described as a neurosensory disorder characterized, in part, by abnormalities in the central nervous system pain processing center. The central nervous system (CNS) consisting of the  brain and spinal cord, are easily injured by accidents or stress. Studies show that people with trauma are 13% more likely to develop Fibromyalgia. Also stress, whether it is from emotional, physical or chemical means, is a cause of this disease.

Trauma and Fibromyalgia.

Fibromyalgia stemming from cervical or any kind of trauma is still very controversial in the medical community. One of my doctors doesn't believe it; one of them does believe that trauma from my auto accident is the cause. I truly believe the trauma from the accident that I had tipped the scale in Fibromyalgia's favor. I was so different 5 years ago. I wanted to move around and through any back pain that I had. I wore heels; high ones. I swore I'd never leave them behind.  Yeah, right. I look in my closet and cannot bear to get rid of them.

The humidity and the subsequent pain that it brings gets me a little moody and introspective. When I start to think about how different my life is today I then go from slightly moody to really pissed off. Sitting on my fanny or curled up in bed in pain isn't my idea of a good time. I don't like to be around a lot of people that know me because they see the difference in me and I hate the pity. Ok, this falls under AFGO. (another fu***ing growth opportunity)

Attention seekers.

I know that some people revel in the fact that they are chronically ill. It gives them the attention they crave. If they didn't find it in illness they would find it in something else. There is not a  question in my mind about it. I do not think that most people fall into this category at all, but the few that do taint it for everyone else. The problem is a two-edged sword. If you lay in bed because you hurt, you're a drama queen over-exaggerating your condition. If you get up and try to fight it then you're able to do something and it's not a disabling condition. It seems that you just can't win.

Life Sentence not Death Sentence.

No, this isn't an illness that will disappear after a round of antibiotics. This will be with me for the rest of my life. Being in jail handcuffed and bound is so tough to take. There will be limitations on my body and my psyche. There are days that I deal with it well and there are days that I don't. I think that I have to go through the process of grieving for the life that I once had but when does the process stop? I can't get to the acceptance stage and be done with it.  I can't worry about the loss and I have to be able to dig deep down and not be somewhat bitter about it.  I have to find something to do and I realize it isn't going to be what I once loved. What I used to do is too physically and emotionally taxing for me to handle at this point in my life. It was a life of stress squared, so I'm gradually learning how to leave it behind and search for another creative outlet. You'd think after five years I'd be able to do that. 

Still, 

it has a category.

It falls under......again......

AFGO.

(another fu**ing growth opportunity).

I'm tired of them........

But, I just never seem to learn.

THE WEATHER AND THE VERY ICKY DAY

It's been cloudy,

it's been humid.

Yippee.

I continue to run my usual errands although with less frequency. To the casual observer I look like anyone else picking out vegetables at the grocery store. You will see me smile and engage in conversation. Only someone who knows me well or has a relationship with chronic pain will notice the stiffness of my shoulders as I walk or sees the slight grimace that I really try to hide as I bend over to pick up something that I will invariably drop. 

Usually, it's my keys.

It's there when I get out of bed in the morning. It tries to give me some hope that the day won't be one spent in a great deal of pain, however, by the time it's evening I know that was just a dream. It's been biding it's time, laying in wait and quietly staying in the background building to an agonizing crescendo that will prevent another night of sleep.

I know that "the experts" say weather does not impact chronic pain but I don't believe them. Not for one single minute. I knew the storm was coming a few days before it got here and with it came its best friend; the black hole. I've gotten pretty good at living with a fair amount of pain. I know it isn't going away anytime soon so on some small level I've accepted it. I do what I need to do and unless you touch me in one of the worst places on my body, my hip, I can manage.

It's when the pain progresses from voodoo pain to the OMG-make-it-stop pain that I have trouble.

Voodoo pain is the pain that I live with. I know that at any point in time someone is going to stab that little voodoo doll with a pin and I will feel a stabbing pain somewhere. If they hug and squeeze that little voodoo doll I'm going to have a dull ache all over my body. Again, this pain I've learned to handle. It's when the pain increases to whole other level; my whole body feels likes it's being compressed like a junk car that is being compressed to the size of a box of cornflakes. That voodoo doll? It's being stabbed all over....over and over again with a ferocious intensity. 

It is that pain that makes me crawl into bed.

It's that pain that turns suffering into isolation.

I'm glad I have people around me that understand and love me through it. I have to say there are times that the pain makes me wonder if this is worth it. Thank goodness it is a momentary thought that immediately goes away but it was enough to bring understanding and compassion for what others feel. Lyrica brought those thoughts and I had to stop taking it. Because of other pain issues I have to take opioids but I don't take enough pain medication to ease the pain. I only take enough to take the edge off. I'm too afraid of the power and control medication can bring and its power to destroy. I don't want to be seduced by the feeling that a pill can make it all go away. I've had a doctor give me medication that truly scared me and that was enough for me to get rid of it. I'd rather have pain than be a zombie.

So how should I spend my day? 

It's one of those cloudy, gloomy days that tends to make me introspective. I tend to think about the person I was before my introduction to chronic pain. I shouldn't go there. At all.

That's probably not the best use of my time. I can't change it so why dwell upon it? As the saying goes, "yesterday is the past, tomorrow is the future and live for today, it's a gift, that's why they call it the present."  I know this but I don't understand it and I don't think I believe it. For me,  there has to be a balance between all of them. The past brought pain. It influenced the future. Which is the present. See what I mean?

Maybe I shouldn't think too much today.

Let's find something good about the weather.

Hmmmm.....

Well, at least it's good for your skin.....

Nope.

Didn't work.

PAIN AWARENESS MONTH...TRUST ME, I'M AWARE OF IT

It's Pain Awareness month. 

One question?

When aren't we aware of it?

September has been designated as Pain Awareness Month. This is the time that various organizations and groups help the general public become aware of pain and pain management. I personally think I have a better way for people to really understand what this is like. Beat the crap out of them with a baseball bat and tell them that this is what they're going to feel like every single day. For the rest of their lives. (Alright...maybe that's a tad extreme...)

It's been a rough summer. It's been humid; more than usual it seems. You know what it seems? It seems that I say that every summer and how often have I mentioned that I don't do well when humidity sets in?  A lot. The pain hasn't let up much and sometimes my "wonderful attitude" goes in the toilet.

There are so many things that affect our bodies and weather is just one of those things. Science is divided on this but I'm not. Barometric pressure definitely has an effect on me and I'm not nuts. I can feel when the rain is coming and my hands start hurting.

And my smiley face becomes a snarl.

But, back to the pain.

Lyrica has been FDA approved for the treatment of Fibromyalgia and I can't take it. Actually, for me, it didn't help the pain all that much and it wouldn't matter to me if it did. The worst side effect is the weight gain. Weight gain puts more pressure on your body so while it may help the pain the weight gain will bring it back. Chronic pain brings its own set of issues and with the weight gain....just add a tiara.  For me, the weight gain is worse than death. I cannot handle it at all. 

Yes, I have food issues.

And right now food isn't my friend.

Growing up I was always thin. Really thin. I was the person you hated. I could, and did, eat noodles and butter and midnight and I never gained an ounce. I hovered between a size 4 and 6. I didn't matter how much or when I ate. The weight was NEVER an issue. Then, with the onset of thyroid issues and the fibromyalgia...........well.......(snarl).

Again, back to pain.

Ok, ok......I'm getting to it.

I've tried all the approved medications. Lyrica, for me, just won't happen. I'm terrified to try Cymbalta and Savella. Why? Because I am notorious for stopping medications if I don't like how I feel or the side effects get too icky. The doctor has told me, in no uncertain terms, that I'm not to stop them cold turkey and need to be weaned off slowly. Well....that did it for me. I know myself and I know I won't do it. I think I need to write a post about all the medications that have been used for our tricky little symptoms.

So....back to the pain.

Now, I try to compartmentalize my treatment and see if it spills over to all the other issues. I have muscle spasms that can be from my back injury or the fibromyalgia. I take tizanidine for that. I take it at night and it seems to help my sleep and my jumpy legs. 

For my back injury I also take a VERY low dose oxycodone. It's just enough (barely) to take the edge off the pain and allow me to function somewhat normally. (Who am I kidding? I've never been normal).

If the pain gets real bad I head for the tub. Swirling water tends to help me the most. I don't know if I just forget about it or it actually relieves the pain. All I know is that for most ailments the tub helps. If it's a cold, steam up the bathroom and just sit in there. No matter what.....head for the bath. If it's just joint stiffness I can start moving and distract myself. Moving helps the most when it's the fibro pain. If it's the back ......all bets are off.

I know I'm rambling......

It's Pain Awareness month. I guess the title says it all. I have been intensely aware of the pain lately and so I just hide. I know that isn't good but I just don't want to be the buzz kill and I don't want to answer questions about it. It isn't a good state in which to exist but I'm entrenched in it and trying to claw my way back up to the surface.

I've become the Shell answer man (for those of you old enough to remember that one!)

"Hey, mom!"

"It's real cloudy."

"How bad do you hurt today?"

"Oh, ok....should I go to the car wash?"

Yep, I'm better than a barometer.

IS IT HOT ENOUGH FOR YOU?

110 degrees.

Under the eaves.

In the shade.

I've never liked the heat and I like it even less now. You'd think that after 51 years in Las Vegas that I would get used to the desert heat.

Not only no.
Hell no.

I didn't mind it as much when I was in the pool but with the onset of age and some common sense, I stopped baking in the sun. Then, when I was working, I spent a great deal of the day in the sales office. I only ventured outside when I couldn't talk anyone into not looking at their home site in the middle of the day. 

Now I just stay inside.

Since the thyroid regulates temperature is it still a by-product of the autoimmune issues I have with it? I take enough thyroid medication to keep it in the "normal" range but maybe it isn't enough. I just can't seem to deal with the heat anymore. I think heat intolerance doesn't adequately describe it.

It makes me sick.
The upside? I can use the Vitamin D.
Did you catch the sarcasm dripping off of that last statement?

We're going to have excessive heat this week. I wasn't kidding about the 110 degrees. The official heat is measured at our airport about 30 feet up and under the eave in the shade. Really. In all actuality it will probably be 117 in the lower parts of the valley. This kind of heat is smothering. The temperature in the car can easily get to 140. You don't mess around with those kind of temperatures.

It gets dangerous.
No kidding.

You have to plan any errands in the "cooler" part of the day. That means before 10 in the morning and after 7 at night. Even then I take a cooler with me to the store because a quick trip can mean frozen food can start to thaw. Sunglasses are a must if you have light sensitivity (which I do). 

And you have to stay hydrated.
Again, no kidding.

So I'm hibernating this week and praying that the heat will break, otherwise, it's going to be a doozy of a summer. That doesn't take into account the amount of money I'll be donating to Nevada Power.

Gee, I can't wait.

So here I am wishing I was in Antarctica.

But.......hey........

it's a dry heat!

So I think I'll watch the fireworks on TV.......

UPDATE: the clouds moved in and it now has started to rain. Yay for the ground, bad for me.

IS IT HOT ENOUGH FOR YOU??

It doesn't make any sense.

I live in Las Vegas.

And I HATE the heat.

I have to say one thing about Fibromyalgia. The internal thermostat definitely doesn't work! I don't like it too hot and I don't like it too cold. I don't like it real windy. I love the rain but I hate the humidity. 

I'm also a pain in the ass.
Anything else I don't like?

But mostly, I hate the heat.

Living in Las Vegas in the summer is like standing in front of a hair dryer. Just turn it on the hottest setting and point it at your face and voila! You're in virtual Vegas. We are in triple digits and I'm just not ready for it. The way I see it is that you can put on sweaters and jackets to stay warm but you can only strip down so far. 

Hot is hot.

And it sucks.

I guess we just can't regulate our thermostat. Usually we have problems with one extreme or the other. As you can guess, mine is the heat. I do much better when the weather is cooler. True to the general theme of Fibromyalgia, other people cannot tolerate the cold weather. Most of us do agree, however, on humidity. We don't perspire as easily either. Maybe that's why the heat really gets to me. Could this be due to my thyroid imbalance? Or is it just another symptom of our hypersensitivity?

Basically, it comes back to that pesky hypothalamus. The HPA axis seems to be popping up everywhere.  I guess the autonomic system is out of whack. Everything seems to point to a problem in this area. What triggers it is anyone's guess but when you trace back the symptoms that we have........well, it all seems to point back to this area of the brain. 

We have malfunctions in the two key areas of the brain. The autonomic system and the HPA axis. These two areas are the major pathways for the bodies response to stressful situations. Considering that we don't handle stress very well...........well, there you have it.

Here's what I don't get. 

What pioneer rode across the country.....in the summer........

Settled on what is now known as Las Vegas......

And said.........

"oh, this is PERFECT....let's settle here!!???"

But back to the heat.

I hate it.

I'm sitting right in the middle of fort stinking desert.

And it hasn't even gotten started.

Hello to Las Vegas in the summer.

MORE THAN A FEELING

I really miss writing.

I just can't think of anything.

I feel like a blob.

It's been a rough month. I'm trying to get my thyroid under control but it takes a long time for the medication to really kick in. Then I wasn't on the right strength and now I'm taking a separate T3 and T4 medication.

I think I'm starting to make headway.

But it's been real rough.

I've had my nails done since I was 16. I got fake nails for my birthday and I never looked back. Imagine my chagrin when the nail liquid caused a reaction that wasn't pretty. I got a reaction that looked like a real bad eczema all over the tips of my fingers. The skin would peel and then they became sensitive. Real sensitive.

So, I had my nails taken off to let my hands heal. 

Couple that with feeling like roadkill. So let's get this straight. I'm gaining weight.....due to the thyroid. I can't sleep....wait...is that due to the Fibro or the thyroid???? My body aches all over...again, due to the Fibro or the thyroid??

Now my hands have to look like crap?

Great.

Let's add a tiara.

I've looked at my blog and had posts in my head. Every time I sat down I thought, "I need to write about this." Then I couldn't think of anything to say. Even as I sit here I feel like someone has taken a baseball bat to my body and beat the crap out of it.

My 61st birthday is this month and I hate it. Everyone says I don't look it but as I look in the mirror I see a woman that needs to lose 25 pounds. I look at my hands and my nails look like crapola.  Then I look in the mirror and see a woman who's attitude is in the toilet.

I want to go back to the gym. ( I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST SAID THAT) Believe it or not, the movement does make me feel better. It's just at this point I will cry through the workout.....I hurt that bad. I want to be able to enjoy this time of my life. Right now all I'm thankful for is my bed and my comfy pillows.

I guess I can be thankful for one thing.

I don't need a facelift.

However, I wouldn't mind one of those lifestyle lifts........

Yes I would......the pain wouldn't feel good and I'm afraid I'd look like the joker.

Am I rambling?????

OK....back to bed.

Did I mention it's been humid???

CLOUDY WITH A CHANCE OF PAIN

 The sky is cloudy and overcast.

It's going to rain.

I love it.

My body doesn't.

Does anyone else react to the weather like I do? I laughed at a recent study that concluded weather had no bearing on Fibromyalgia pain.

My fanny it doesn't.

At least I said fanny.

I, like many others, have different levels of pain. I call the worst pain voodoo pain and it progresses to OMG-make it stop. Right now I'm somewhere between the two. I feel like a Steve Miller song. Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right. 

It's a barometric pressure free for all and I'm stuck right in the middle.

I feel like I'm on a never ending cycle right now. No sleep equals more pain. I take medication for the pain and muscle relaxers for the muscle spasms. I am too afraid to take something to help me sleep. I take an over the counter natural medication called Mid Nites. All they are is valerian and melatonin. It helps a little but it doesn't keep me from waking 2 or three times in the middle of the night. Why my brain won't shut off is beyond me. I can't just shut down and go to sleep. It doesn't matter that my bedroom is dark or that I've taken a hot shower before bed. I've tried all the remedies that say "do this and you'll get a good nights sleep." It doesn't matter at all. Alpha wave intrusion just won't let me reach the deeper levels of sleep and my body desperately needs it. 

I look outside and the clouds are building again. I just opened the door and it's REALLY humid. This tells me I have no chance of getting relief tonight. My body hurts and this puts my attitude in the toilet. 

Way in the toilet.

I'm thinking of life before Fibromyalgia and chronic pain. Big mistake. This brings me to my pity party for one. I feel myself getting frustrated for what could have been. I'm also crying because every single bone in my body aches. 

Right now I just want to curl up with my favorite men.

Who are they you ask??

With a slightly mysterious smile...

I'll bet you'll never guess.

OK.

I'll tell you......

It's............

 My coping mechanism.

4 or 5 of those make a nice snack.

PAIN IS A FOUR LETTER WORD

I don't know if it's the weather.

I don't know if it's stress.

I do know that it hurts to be me.

Sometimes pain just permeates your whole being and takes over your life. Just when you get used to one level of pain another one decides to take you by surprise. It kind of likes to stop by and say hello just in case you've forgotten about it.  It doesn't want to go away gracefully.

Pain wants to rob you of your joy. I don't care whether it's physical, emotional or spiritual pain. It wants to be your nasty little reminder that pain can take away your day in one fell swoop.

Having a good day?

Wrong.

I tend to second guess myself right now. I feel a twinge and I know what's coming. Should it always be like that? Am I forever bound to a life where I measure every twinge and jab? I  also can't stay in one position for too long. My legs are starting to twitch so I know the night is going to be a long one.

Is it wise to know or is it better to let it take you by surprise?

I don't know if it's the humidity levels or just the stress of the season. I tell myself I'm going to pace myself and just do what I can. The problem is that even as I'm typing those words I know how ridiculous that sounds. My problem has never been to "just do what I can." If I'm able to, or even if I'm not able to, I keep going until I collapse. This isn't a good way to handle the holiday season.

What am I saying?

It's not a good way to handle this life. Period.

Isn't it pathetic when I can't handle shopping? Just looking at that statement depresses me. You'd think it would be so fun to go out and shop. All I know is that I can't face the stores. It's just too much to deal with and the other thing is the crowds. I can't handle that many people.

OK. 

Enough.

Time to stop sounding pathetic.

I need to put a smile on my face.

Is it working?

Nope.

That's a four letter word too.

I WANT TO GO BACK TO MAYBERRY

It's been quite a week.

I'm not just talking about the pain.

Both personally and in our nation.

First of all, what do you say about the shootings of innocent children in Connecticut? I cannot imagine what those parents and families are going through right now. Also, the survivors....what those children witnessed......it's horrific and there are no words that will comfort those parents. Their dear, dear children's lives were cut short and they must be inconsolable with pain and grief.

Also, I got word that a former co-worker passed away. She was young. She was 51 and didn't feel well. She took a nap and when they went to check on her.....well, it was already too late. Her daughter was her best friend and she's still quite young. She graduated high school in 2011 and was away at college. 

I've had to learn the lesson of mortality at an early age as well. I can tell you that isn't a lesson that should be learned early. It changes you. It gives you the feeling that all relationships are on shaky ground because they can disappear at a moments notice. Closeness becomes scary.

Then, to add a tiara to the week, with all these things happening, it's cold and raining. That means the pain has spiraled once again. 

If it isn't one thing it's another.

I'm not trying to minimize the happenings or compare them to the pain that has attacked my body once again. I'm just adding it to the list of events of the week. There is nothing that can compare to that kind of loss. Then compound that loss with the addition of senseless violence and what can be said?

I hate these kind of life lessons.

I hate the change that life lessons bring; the innocence of life that is lost and the realization that the people you love most can be taken away from you in the blink of an eye. Parents should never have to bury their children and little children should not know loss. They should be safe and secure in the knowledge that their parents will be there. Parents should not know the all-consuming grief and pain that their beautiful little sweethearts are gone.

What is wrong with this world?

What will inevitably happen is that the issue of gun control will come up again. It will be debated and debated but nothing ever seems to get done. I truly believe on the one hand that if guns are outlawed then only the outlaws will have guns. The war on alcohol during Prohibition, the war on drugs, the war on terror and now the war on guns.....to what end? They are all still alive and well despite the efforts to rid our world of them. I do believe that we need stricter laws and background checks before anyone can purchase them. I think online sales should be banned. I think certain types of guns should not be in the hand of private citizens. Military weapons are just that...military weapons. You need an assault rife to kill a deer??

I think it's our culture that is sick and in need of help.
You can ban all types of weapons but you just can't ban evil.

I think it's time we get rid of our culture of certain kinds of tolerance. You cannot teach children that everything they do wrong is someone elses fault or that something else is to blame. We need to bring back consequences for actions. We've become a society that doesn't want to hurt that little inner child. We equate discipline with abuse. When did it become acceptable for manners to go out the window? When did "please" and "thank-you" get deleted from our vocabulary? When did we decide that just because children grow up less fortunate they should be given a pass? We have done that in our educational system and look what the effect of that has been. I've seen what so-called high school graduates have learned and it's appalling. We need to crank our curriculum up about 7 notches so we can start raising children who will be capable of working in this global economy.

If I sound like I want to take our culture back about 40 years......well, I do and I don't. In some respects.....I do. I look at what children can see on TV during prime time and I honestly don't know how I'd answer the questions that would arise. The innocence that should be childhood has been wiped away. Growing up too soon is all over the news and it's "cool." Am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?

I don't think I'm old fashioned. I'm not trying to be an old grandma but I see society heading in a direction that isn't good.....

Enough.....

I'm off my soapbox.

But...........

I hope that everyone hugs those they love a little tighter tonight.