Monday, November 25, 2013


The holidays are coming!
Like everyone who writes about chronic issues,
there are hints and tips about getting through the holidays.
So, in the spirit of the day,
I also have helpful hints, observations, and a peek into my day.
Here goes!

First....Make all your grocery lists from bed. Give the list to your kids, spouse or significant other. Send them to the store. Assign the side dishes to the rest of the group.
Stay in bed.

Well, the house needs to be a roomba on the floor. Turn on the ceiling fan and watch the dust will rise to the ceiling. Look around and decide that it doesn't look too bad. Great!! 
Go back to bed.

Get on the phone to your local grocery. Most of the deli departments will make the turkey. Send someone down there to pay for it and make sure the store is open on Thanksgiving. It is? Great! If you're exhausted from making holiday arrangements roll over and put the pillow over your head.
Stay in bed.

It's the big day!! You'll need to get out of bed to get ready to greet guests. You definitely don't want to be stressed today. Since there's plenty of football on, just wear the sweats from your favorite team. This way you're game appropriate and in jammies at the same time! If you want to put on makeup start 5 hours ahead ... that should give you plenty of time. Shower and makeup done?
Get back in bed!

Have the turkey picked up or preferably delivered. This should be done a couple of hours before the guests arrive because the wonderful aroma from that glorious turkey needs to permeate the house.  Just an the turkey in a roasting pan and throw the ones from the store in the garbage cans outside. It helps to practice your exhausted-from-cooking look in the mirror. It also helps if you throw a little flour around the kitchen. Hold the cannister tightly otherwise you'll have flour everywhere. I learned this one the hard way. Also, I didn't realize how much my dog Buster loved flour. Yay! It's a game!!! I chased after him and had to clean the little flour paw prints that were throughout the house. After you're done cleaning the flour off the counters and sure to shake the flour out of your hair too....
Go back to bed.

I don't have to set the table. Why? Because I keep dining room table set year round. This way I don't have to worry about it. Quick tip? Just wipe the dust that has accumulated around the edges of the table. Practice your smile. have an hour before guests arrive?Better not push it...
Go back to bed.

Thanksgiving is here! The smells in the house are divine! Guests are arriving and bringing heavenly dishes for tasting! It's time to gather 'round the table grateful for each other and all blessings.....(Don't hold my hands too tight....that hurts!) I'm so thankful for my family and friends.......and my bed.

As we enjoy the glorious food and company, I've been reminded of the times of years past...I sigh wistfully.....or was that a snore? Damn.....I'm starting to go under from the tryptophan. It's the dreaded turkey coma! At least when dinner is over  I can curl up on the couch pretending to be interested in the game. Stay awake.....stay awake.....stay awake....
How many hours till I'm back in bed?

I rise from the table full with bones creaking and stiff. I've been sitting so long that the pain is making me dizzy. Or is that the wine? The couch is calling and the noise from the shouts of the lastest touchdown make my head hurt. Or is it the wine?  Maybe I should head back to the kitchen and help with the dishes. Really? It's all done?? Oh how wonderful!  I'm so thankful that everyone else has cleaned the kitchen! Where did all the time go?? Dishes are washed and glasses sparkling....The dining room table has been reset waiting for next year! Really? It's time to go already? You can't stay? Did I just totally zip on the day?? I don't remember.

So I shuffle back to the bedroom and climb in my comfy bed and cover myself with a nice warm comforter. It's been a long day and I'm ready to close my eyes in glorious slumber. 


Now, I can't sleep.

Happy Thanksgiving!


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