Thursday, January 31, 2013
Sometimes you get real tired.
Tired of being tired.
Tired of pain.
I think it's just been one of those times where everything just seems to get on your nerves. It's as if I'm down to the last nerve and everything seems to get on it.
It's as if I'm back living in my pain world. It's the world where pain takes front and center. My day revolves around the level of pain that I feel. I know my limitations and I don't like them. I've never liked limitations and as I've gotten older I like them even less.
I don't care if it's mental, physical or speed limits.
I get tired of saying, "I'm tired" or "I hurt." It gets old to my ears let alone to anyone else's. I know that those around me don't mind. That isn't the issue. They love me enough to be here with me through all of this.
All of this just gets real old to me.
It seems that the magnitude of all of this has crept up and smacked me in the face. How do you say all of this without sounding like a whimpering little baby? Just because your body hurts and every bone and muscle in your body has turned on you.....you have the audacity to bring your life to a halt?
It sounds ridiculous even to me.
I've got a life of slow motion.
That has run head on into the reality of pain.