Wednesday, December 28, 2011

BODY APOLOGETICS








I know that we shouldn't do too much.
Having said that,
I offer my sincerest apologies to my body.

This time of year gets crazy. Partly, because it just is and partly because I tend to make it that way. I just love buying presents. I don't do it well because I get very excited and tend to give them before Christmas. Then I have to go out and buy some more gifts. This adds stress because my budget for presents is smaller this year.

I need to not shop until the very last day.

I love finding unusual gifts as well. My kids call them "my latest obsession." I use them as stocking stuffers and, to be honest, they're just goofy little gifts. One year it was dental dots and another year it was Blender Balls. 

Am I the only one that does this?

Anyway, since Christmas I've been staying close to home and close to my bed. My whole body feels like it's been run over by a truck or, as I like to refer to it; roadkill. I'm using this time to catch up and read blogs and articles that I haven't read in a long time. I feel like I've been neglecting my friends...well, I have been and I need to get back to them. My heart is heavy as I read how my friends feel right now.

This is a condition that plays with your mind. Chronic pain can bring with it all kinds of gadgets and it wants to set up housekeeping in your body. We still grieve for the life that we used to have but there is a difference between that and depression. 

Or feeling like we're utterly alone.

We go through this life blissfully unaware that at any moment our bodies could turn on us. When it does, it leaves us bewildered and afraid. The one thing we thought we could count on was our body. Is it any wonder that we don't know how to react?

We need to be very careful about the isolation that chronic pain brings to our lives. Isolation is depressions best friend. They want to lure us to that dark place and share with us its lies. It will tell us that this fight isn't worth it. It will whisper its lies to us every day and with every passing moment that lie gains a foothold on our minds. We have to remain vigilant.

That's where the battlefield is.

If there is one person out there that needs our strength then we need to be there for them. All of us lose our strength and will at times. We all need each other. We need each other to share our joys and triumphs and our laughter and tears.

I pray that the new year brings comfort and relief from our physical pain as well as our emotional pain.

I pray that the new year brings an avenue for each of us to realize and reach for our dreams all the while staying mindful that we need to recognize and accept our limitations.

I pray that the new year brings an awareness of Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue and the research necessary to find a cause and a cure.

I pray that the new year brings renewal and restoration to those that I know and love.

I pray that we're also a little bit kinder to ourselves.