Wednesday, May 5, 2010

I'M NOT A SCREAMER




But I could have.

I always wondered if I would recognize if something were really wrong inside of my body. As of a couple of days ago the answer is unequivocally yes.

I started to feel a little rocky Monday afternoon. No big deal just a little twinge that was slightly uncomfortable. It was an intermittent pain just under my belly button. I wasn't really alarmed and I figured that I hadn't eaten so after dinner everything would be just fine. Along with the fact that Fibromyalgia can really throw your body into fits of mysterious pains and problems I figured that I really had no cause for alarm.

As the day wore on I thought I might be getting the flu. The intermittent pain was becoming more noticeable and stronger. I felt a little warm to the touch. My sweetie asked if I wanted dinner and I didn't think it would be a good idea. Nothing sounded appetizing and I just wanted to get in bed.

All of a sudden I was hit by pain that was in no way the flu. I tried resting and it got worse. Then the pain started radiating down to my lower right side. That did it.  I went to the hospital. I hate to wait and I'm not good at it; however, after cardiac problems, stroke or something major, appendicitis should be right after that. I mean, how do you know if it will burst while you're waiting to be seen for THREE HOURS. I just don't do well with that at all. I actually told the woman checking me in that I understood how people die here. Then I waited another couple of hours for the CAT scan. Then I was left to wait in the critical care unit until 7:30 in the morning. Finally I got a room and covered up and waited for my kids.

I knew that my daughter would be upset. I kept sending her texts because I thought if she heard her phone she'd freak. Finally when they came in and said it was acute appendicitis and I'd be heading for surgery I called her. This was at 3 in the morning so I didn't think she'd answer. Part of me hoped she would and the other part was glad she didn't. I left her a message that started out with , "it's okay, don't worry but." I had no clue how much it affected her until I heard her voice when she called in the morning. When I heard that defenseless little voice; the voice that reminded me of her at 2 crying for me, the voice that she had when she was scared or hurt and I was the only one she turned to. When I heard the voice that  said "mommy, where are you?" I lost it. It took me back so many years but then I realized how the tables had turned. I was there with her for all the hospitalizations and illness issues but she's never seen me in that position.  I was so glad she was here and not in Florida.

I had no idea how much an appendectomy can hurt. My stomach area is swollen and sore. I'm just glad it's over. They kept me in for 24 hours and now I'm home. I'm glad to be in my own bed and I'm doing what we used to call the OB shuffle. If you've had kids you probably know what this is. A couple of days and I'll be back to good or bad as new.........whatever the case may be.

What did I like about the hospital?

The morphine was outstanding.........

3 comments:

  1. Oh My gosh!!!!!!!
    Talk about adding insult to injury. I'm so glad you are ok and nothing burst except the bubble of your always being the one to be there for others.
    Here's to a quick and speedy recovery.
    Judith Westerfield
    P.S. Let your Fibro-Aliens know now is not the time for a visit.

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  2. Dear Rose,
    I'm so glad you are okay. What beautiful words you say about your daughter. You are a wonderful mother, that is clear.
    We always want to know our mothers are okay. I know that for sure. I wish all mothers had the huge heart you do.
    Keep resting and drink lots of fluids and eat some chicken soup and... well, I can't think of anything else. I'll quote my friend, "Give yourself a big hug, or a little one, or a half of one, whatever you can manage and know that it is from me."

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  3. PS
    I wish my avatar of my sweet dog would show up on my comments. I don't know why it doesn't anymore.
    I know that would help too. She is sooo cute.
    dogkisses

    ReplyDelete

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