Saturday, June 12, 2010


One day it's 110.
One day it's 70.
One day the humidity is 6%
One day the humidity is 40%

I feel like a wandering soul that is seeking equilibrium. Hence the name. Everything is the same and yet nothing stays the same. How do you find peace in that kind of environment?

I've been going to the support group and met some really nice women. My initial feelings about the group is that they try too hard to skirt the real issues of Fibromyalgia. I may be totally way off base because this is only my second time there, however, it seems like they only want it to be upbeat. I feel bad saying this because I really like these women AND I've been in a real pissy mood lately. Chalk it up to the heat or the flare, I don't know, but maybe it's just my mood. Believe me, it hasn't been pretty. Physically and emotionally, I've been on a major roller coaster so please read the rest of this with that in mind. It could all be in my mind.

I know that no one wants or needs to go to a real downer meeting but there are real problems that need to be faced with Fibromyalgia. There are people that need to speak out about how they feel because that might be the only place where they can speak. There are emotional, physical and financial issues. It would be nice to have support but I think people are very frightened of pain; even those people that experience it on a daily basis.  Pain touches us on a real primal level. We become fearful and automatically back away but we need to reach out and  embrace it because if we don't no one will. I also think that we've become so used to rejection, by both the medical community and our own family and friends, that we are afraid to look vulnerable. 

Again, I know that no one needs to get more depressed than they probably are but there needs to be a time set aside where people can express themselves so they don't feel like they're out there on their own. There are other people that feel the same way, have the same thoughts and hate this illness as much as they do.

There's a double edged sword to this invisible illness and sometimes we use it on ourselves. We want so desperately to come out of the shadows but when we do we deny the very feelings we want to express. We understand what we are going through on a daily basis and those feelings need to be addressed in a venue where we can feel safe and supported. 

We live in a world of an invisible illness. The last place we need to feel invisible is in our support group. 


  1. I had the opposite experience. The support groups I attended were so "down" that I stopped going. I have a few girlfriends I can bitch, moan and cry with so I'm blessed.

  2. It truly is difficult to find that balance between "bitch and moan" and "I love you, you love me".

    It seems though, that a meeting could be set up so that there was a time and place for both. A support group I was involved in (not Fibro) kind of solved it by having presentations/speakers/what-not at the beginning of the meeting, then had a break. At this point guests/speakers or those not wanting to stay could tactfully leave. Those who wanted/needed to stay to vent, ask questions, share then stayed another 1/2 to an hour longer. Just a thought.

    Seems like we are all on one side or the other at one point or another. It is hard to strike a balance...whether we are at a support group or not.


  3. I wish there was a really amazing support group that I could go to for these illnesses. I could use one haha.

    Come visit me at It's Time To Get Over How Fragile You Are!


  4. Annie, if you stop back by contact me. I love your blog and tried to leave a comment but couldn't! It is great!!!!

  5. Rose, I know a woman who stopped a group as she said it was depressing to her but it sounded great to me, lol, so I agree with you. We can't ignore our pain and why in the world would we need to in a support group. I mean if we want to have a really fun time we can watch a funny video or the comedy channel.
    I understand balance too.
    It reminds me of a poem by Rumi. I think it is called "The Guest House."
    He speaks to welcoming all the guests that come into our homes (our minds and hearts), and making a place for them.
    I have always remembered this. So I think a support group should welcome all the guests -- joy, happiness, peace, sadness, grief, anger, rage, worry and pain.
    Perhaps since you like these women you could bring up how you feel.
    I wish you luck.
    Your friend, dogkisses. Or as I think you like calling me, Michelle. ((((smiles and hugs))))


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